Downunder Don asks if Master and I ever talk about what He gets out of spanking me.....
Yes, we have. The first time was shortly after we had started on this adventure. I was struggling (with a lot of things), but one of the main issues was...if He spanks me and i want, need or even crave it, does that make this all about me? How is that submissive? Master said to me....i am the opposite side of His coin..."He is the Dominant side of the coin, i am the submissive side. I complete Him." Those words have stuck with me.....together we are whole. I feed His feeling of dominance, He gets to express it daily.....in return, my submission is also fed.
Ella What happens during a discipline spanking? Are there rules?
Of course there are rules and it is a ritual. A punishment spanking happens in the basement. Yes, He opens the door and i make the march of doom down the stairs into the basement. There is no chatter, I am told to bare myself, and get in position. Leaning over hanging onto the seat of a chair that is always down there. (in the early years, there was a treadmill, i had to stand on the treadmill and hang on..not it was never turned on). I am reminded that if my hands leave the chair, the stroke will be repeated. Master has this large paddle ball paddle that He purchased at a garage sale for one dollar. He tells me how many....i cannot remember, but 25 seems to ring a bell. He spanks slowly, scolding very loudly, no breaks, no rubbing...just spanks and loud scolding...and He is an excellent scolder. When He is done, i am told to stand, and pull up my underwear. I am reminded there will be no permissions for 24 hours, we then hug and i am told i have a clean slate.
I can happily report that it has been over a year, since one of these....
rperez asks....what does my kneeling time consists of and how long does it last?
Kneeling time is what Master calls re-claiming time. Back when i was still teaching, kids were still home, life was much busier. Spankings were not as regular as they are now. Master and i would meet, and depending on the kind of day i had...i might not be in the most submissive of moods. Master's solution..reclaiming time. Once i am naked, i kneel, hands behind my back, Master stands behind me. He starts by telling me that all of me is His....His hands cover my ears and eyes, telling me to block out any voices or thoughts...He touches all the parts of my body, reminding me that they are His. While He is doing this, He is quietly talking talking, ...by the time He is done, all of me is quiet, and focused on Him. He then helps me up....How long...maybe 10 minutes..,
Wilma Rubble asks...from where i am now, looking back, how do i see myself? Do I feel that the submissive part of me was always there, that perhaps others saw, but that i could not put a voice to...not spanking, but true submission?
Interesting question.....When i first met Master, it was just to get a spanking...yes one, so i could get that darn fantasy out of my system. Well one led to another, and then another...but i never associated spanking with submission. The first time Master referred to me as submissive, i laughed and said...No Way! Well, slowly He showed me the way.
I have to add, I had felt for a long time, that something was missing from my life. I was not sure what it was i was longing for...i was pretty sure i would never find whatever it was. I now know....that nagging little voice was trying to tell me....you don't have to be the one in charge all of the time, the go-to person for everyone. I only started to hear that voice when it belonged to Master, when i realized how much more content and happy i was as His submissive. He deserves a lot of credit, i was very stubborn and not an easy sell.....but slowly, i started to know....to feel....that i needed to let that part of me that i had buried so long ago, breathe and exist. Yes, i do think the submissive part of me was always there, i was too busy being in charge to even consider letting that part see the light of day.
Thanks for the questions..