Tuesday, February 24, 2015

Asking..ARGHHHHHH...

           Will i ever get to the point where i can ask, and not have it be a big deal.....You know Nike's "Just Do It" campaign...i need a just "Just Ask It", campaign.  I woke up the other day, feeling like i wanted....no needed....to feel Master's dominance.  But it was also a day when i knew He had lots on His plate already, so i just sent my regular "good morning"...we chatted a bit, and i got out of bed.  We were in contact all day, but i did not mention anything.  By the next day, i had gone into my 'quiet mode'.  
       As soon as i get my 'welcome' hug, Master wants to know what is happening...problems at home, not feeling well, something with us??  I tell Him i was just feeling needy....for no particular reason...and almost asked for an extra task or something, and just talked myself out of it.  I know, in my head, that asking is not demanding...and the answer is His choice.  He has so rarely said no to me when i ask, i cannot remember the last time He did.  He is shaking His head....tells me again that asking pleases Him.  "Master may i have a hard spanking today"...is music to His ears.  Asking for an extra task, keeps Him smiling all day.  He then says... You know , i almost gave you an hourly task knowing that i would be busy all day....we were on same wave length, you just needed to speak up....to ask.  
     It is maintenance day, so i am told to kneel and think about our chat.  Master's hands are covering my eyes, my ears...closing out everything but us.  He claims me before He invites me over His lap.  After a hand warm-up, He switches to the maintenance paddle.  It hurts, even tho He is not spanking hard.  He knows i am struggling, tells me my head is still not where it should be.  He spanks a little harder telling me, this is not maintenance...it is a 'looking for my submissive' spanking, since she seems to have lost herself. Let me know where you are found...and i have her back.  The spanks get a little harder and after a few set, i tell Him that i am back...Sir.
     Now, maintenance starts.  Maintenance is usually a couple sets with a break in between.  This first set seems to last forever, and it is hard.  When He stops , i am thinking, another set to go, when i hear Him ask, are you pleased that maintenance is over?  It takes me a bit to answer, as i am wondering if i heard correctly.  He chuckles and says....you are debating?  I tell Him no, i am glad it is over, i just thought it was a trick question.  He laughs and says...well the paddling part is over.
    He has me stand, He reaches and stats unbuckling His belt.  Ah.....on a well warmed bottom....i am smiling.  I am told to get into position, i will get 2 sets of 12.  Yummy....I do love that belt...OK...any belt that is Master's!  When He is done, i am told to stay in position, as He leans into me from behind.  I am dripping, and Master takes advantage of that.....and permissions are soon granted.  I am reminded that asking pleases Him, that He expects me to let Him know when i need Him...for whatever reason....reading my mind can be an 'iffy' thing.  

*****the weather here is still brutal.  The average temperature for February ...12 degrees...broke a 100 year record.  We have had the most days with a below zero reading, over 4 feet of snow, just this moonth, and no temps above freezing in way over a month.  I know we are not alone, and some of you have more snow...but good grief.....please let Spring be early....

*****I also got that wonderful letter from blogger.  I feel my blog is fairly tame, and i don't post pics....but just in case, i am thinking it is time to back everything up.  Is there anyone who can give me an easy way to do that...thanks!!

hugs abby

25 comments:

  1. I could have written your first two paragraphs word for word so many times. I feel like asking is bad; not topi g from the bottom, but wrong somehow. He sees it as letting him know where my head is at. I wish I could see it that way. Great post.

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    1. Oh.....you have summarized it well. I am getting a tiny bit better.....but oh those 'voices' can be so convincing.....
      Thanks for the comment...
      hugs abby

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  2. It would be so easy to "just do it" We have so much in our lives, so much of the time, but your Master seems to cover most bases.

    I have been trying to move and if it works, I will let you know xxxcx

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    1. Please do let me know.....Master is amazing at reading me and making me feel like a top priority....i am lucky..
      hugs abby

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  3. Abby, I'm glad Master understood the "quiet mode" and knew you needed him to find you! Asking is always so hard to do. I always feel like I should be able to figure it out on my own and be able to make the wishes in my head match my actions, but when I'm struggling the two are never in sync. Do you think Master would help you come up with a word or a phrase that would let him know you're struggling without having to spill it all out when the words get stuck? Luke has come to understand that when I come to him and kneel in front of him, I need his help. Sometimes it takes awhile for the words to catch up but he understands the action and then waits for me to talk to him. Maybe you could have a word or phrase to text to him that alerts him.

    Hang in there, spring has to come eventually!!

    Hugs,
    Clara

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    1. What a great idea.....He reads me really well, but your idea would at least be a step in my being able to ask for help...something that i do find very difficult.
      Thanks for the suggestion, i am sure we will be trying it...after Master adapts it to make it His...
      hugs abby

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  4. Blog letter that I had gotten had a link at the bottom with a way to back u your blog so you should have gotten one to. I have a hard time asking Daddy for things especially when I know he is stressed or has a lot on his plate so your not alone.

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    1. I did get the letter and the notice, i am just such a non techie.....but i have asked for help....LOL...
      hugs abby

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  5. I feel like there is something in the air and it's not the Blogger letter. For the past few days I have felt lost and unmotivated despite plenty of things to keep me busy. This of course turns into being "needy" when He gets home at night and is often tired. I'm happy you got your hard spanking. Take care.

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    1. That 'needy' feeling...i so have a hard time dealing with it.....In my rational moments i do realize that the neediness, helps my submission...my willingness to serve Him....but it is not a feeling i think i will ever get used to.
      hugs abby

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  6. Master is definitely not a mind reader Abby...you know it makes him happy when you ask so please do so next time. The blogger letter...*sigh* Think it is simply because you have the 'adult content' flag set to 'yes'...flip it to 'no' and you should be fine. Meanwhile, everyone should back their blog up on a regular basis. Check your email...sent you instructions. Let me know if you have any questions.

    Hugs and Blessings...
    Cat

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    1. Thanks for the wonderful instructions...i am such a non techie person...they were perfect. I did go back to try and change the adult content flag...but now cannot find it...DUH...
      hugs abby

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    2. cat would you mind sending me instructions on how to back up my blog, too...thanks! much appreciated :-)

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  7. Hi Abby, asking is so hard, but you know it pleases Master. I'm glad he reads you so well and knew what you needed. Funny how you were on the same wave length. I think Clara's idea is a great one.

    Try and stay warm. Hope the weather eases for you soon.

    Hugs
    Roz

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    1. I love Clara's idea too....He reads me really well...i find that both discerning and wonderful...
      hugs abby

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  8. Hi Abby, I am just greedy. I never worry about asking! The weather looks awful over there, I don't know how you do it. It's just a bit chilly and windy here.
    As to the blogger thing ,like Cat said I think it might be the adult content button. I haven't had a letter but mine was already set to no. I imagine I never thought to set it to yes and I seem to have been left alone
    love Jan,xx

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    1. LOL.....I worry because He often has so much on His plate already.... I have to find that adult content button.
      hugs abby

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  9. Hi Abby, feeling needy is what simply happens and I think that too often we are our own worst enemies when we are in such a moment and do not ask our HoHs for help, although they are waiting for us to tell them about it. But asking is not always easy, even if encouraged to do so. I am just glad that you have your Master and he saw you in quiet-mode. Hope you get early warm spring weather.

    hugs

    Nina

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    1. You are right about being my own worst enemy. I am getting a little better.....I almost always get a yes.....so i should be more willing to ask.
      hugs abby

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  10. I just posted, there's a link in there how to back up.

    Asking is SO damn hard!!!!

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    1. Thanks for the link...i am such a computer dummy.
      It is damn hard.....
      hugs abby

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    2. I don't know why I didn't mention this before but, I also have my posts emailed to me (you can do that by going into "Settings", then "Mobile and Email", and type your email into the "Email post to" box) because computers crash and you can never be too safe! :)

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    3. Ahh..my posts automatically get mailed to Master...never thought of mailing them to myself..thanks..
      hugs abby

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  11. I understand the difficulty asking when feeling needy - If my husband is stressed with work or busy, I am afraid of adding to his stress by demanding attention...though I know he would probably respond favorably if he knew... Hugs

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    1. It is hard to get over the...asking is not demanding...and they are are really not mind readers.....way of thinking.
      hugs abby

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