Master and I went three weeks without seeing each other. It is the longest time since I don't know when. Between traveling...family and business...work, appointments, etc...real life just kept getting in the way.
But finally, yesterday, Master did not return to work after lunch, it was our time! I have to admit, I was looking forward to it, and not looking forward to it. I returned from my trip having gained a little over 2 pounds, all things considered, not awful, but a gain. Master took the news well, told me to get back on track and He wanted some kind of exercise every day until I was back at my goal. I asked for 5 days a week, but was told every day. My weigh in yesterday was plus a little less than 1 pound. I blamed Mother's day weekend and the fact that I gave myself the weekend off.
Master told me yesterday that when I next blogged I was to include this.....Monday's maintenance was a hard paddling with My lexan paddle....and I let her off easy. I have to add, He is right.
By the time we finally physically connected I was feeling a little loss. My 'voices' returned, and although I was able to argue with them a bit, they did wear me down. When Master and I were first starting on our voyage, when I was feeling very insecure about something, I would wake up in the middle of the night and converse with the voices. That usually ended up in my sending Master an e-mail in the middle of the night, hoping that would help me get back to sleep...and writing about certain things in the middle of the night, was a LOT easier than talking about them in the light of day. No, I did not send am email, but I could feel myself starting to withdraw and did consider picking up a stone or two to re-build some walls.
Master greeted me with hugs and soft talk. Reminding me that I am His, that He takes that very seriously. Soon I was naked and kneeling and being re-claimed, and finally I started to relax and breathe.
Master reminded me that this was a Maintenance Monday, but He was also not happy that I had gained even after I returned home, and that I had not followed His directive on exercise. He hates going backwards.
I was invited over His lap, a concession on His part that I was/am very thankful for...and He even started off with a quick hand warm-up. Then He started in with that darn paddle. Each set was a build-up in speed and power. I was kicking and ouching, and trying to move away, and even told Him once to stop. Not my best behavior. He would stop and talk and calm me and start again. Finally He started on a set and I just lay there, head down, panting, but staying quiet and in place. I hear Master say, finally....acceptance. When He finishes this set, He tells me to ask for another set, saying that I want it to be the hardest yet, so I remember it for a long time, and to say it loudly and as if I mean it. Master knows this is difficult for me, so He gives me a minute or two, and I ask. He agrees and starts with the hardest,
longest set yet. Finally it is over.
We move on to more enjoyable activities. Master remarks that I am already "sloshing" wet, I am so ready for His touch.We start off quickly, and then slowly just enjoy each other. It is good to be together again, and to know I am where I belong.
I did get a strong warning about my next weigh-in, and the consequences of 3 gains in a row. I have been exercising, even twice yesterday....so here's hoping the diet gods are listening!