Thursday, May 31, 2012

A real spanking only starts when you want it to end

My title is how Master greeted me yesterday, He said He read it someplace, and liked it. I was a little wary, but it did get my butterflies fluttering.

Yesterday I asked Master if I could have a casino day on Friday. I have not been in a while and I expected a yes...I very rarely get a no. His reply was yes...if you meet your weight goal for this week, no if you don't. I replied I wanted a simple yes, no conditions, He would not agree. I spent the rest of the morning pouting. One of my tasks is to contact Master at noon, so He remembers to take a break, I did not feel like talking to Him, so I decided I would send a simple text. (I know, I am not the perfect submissive!)

A little before noon, Master calls me. He asks if I am still pouting. I answer honestly. He reminds me, He says yes way too often, and has not said no. If He gets what He wants, I get what I want. He wants me to go, He just wants me to get to that goal first. As we continue to chat my mood lightens and we make plans to meet later...maintenance has not happened yet this week.

I am close to that goal and will almost certainly be there by Friday. I think what I objected to was the condition, I can go if....once again, my submissive 'halo' is tarnishing.

We meet and after some catching up chat, I am naked and kneeling, being claimed. Then it is over Master's lap, for a wonderful hand warm-up. He then proceeds to the hairbrush. He is not being gentle, but the swats are fairly easy to adjust to. He then asks why am I over His knee...for maintenance, Sir. Why do we have maintenance, to keep me out of trouble and having to go to the basement for a major punishment, Sir. Have we been to the basement this year? No Sir, thankfully. His reply is...then I opt for continuing with good hard maintenance spankings.

He tucks me in...the signal that He is about to rev it up. He is spanking hard and fast, quick stops between sets to let me catch me breath, but no rubbing. Finally He asks, have you had enough. Yes Sir! You want me to stop? Yes Sir! Normally at this point He would stop. Instead He repeats the quote, tucks me in, and shows me He was was not going at full strength or full speed. It was harder than I have been spanked in a while. I have not idea how long, but I do remember feeling like I was being surrounded by, or maybe overtaken by the pain. It was like nothing else existed. Maybe I was on the edge of what some call 'sub space', almost like it hurt so good.

He stops and I am trying to compose myself and catch my breath, but Master quickly moves on to other pleasures. I am quickly ready to explode, and do several times. We continue to enjoy each for some time. I am certainly no longer pouting, and am determined to get to the casino!

Master also commented on my last post, the list of words to describe Him. He said it was accurate and He really liked it!!

hugs
abby

Monday, May 28, 2012

Master

Hope you all had a good holiday weekend. HOT here...over 90 today, too hot for me!

I took the idea for this post from Sin. She listed words describing her Master. Since this is me, I had to add a few comments!

Master is...

dominant....practically goes without saying and sounds nicer than bossy

consistent...a blessing and a curse, but I can count that He says what he means, and means what He says.

great sense of humor...I treasure this one, how can a person trust a person they can't break out in giggles with?

stubborn...until I met Master I was the 'subborness' person I knew, this took getting used to

hard working...good and bad, He needs more down time!

good with His hands...he can fix cars, redo bathrooms and kitchens, and turn me to jello!

sexy...nothing to add, just a deep breath

creative...sometimes I ask myself how does He come up with some of His ideas???? Keeps things fun!

sadistic...this one took getting used to :)

able to read minds...even from a distance He knows what I am thinking, this can be a little discerning

I saved the best one for last.....


My Master...mine!

hugs abby

Saturday, May 26, 2012

rating....effort or results

I weighed in on Friday and lost a pound and a half. Most of you know that Master had decreed that I had to lose 2 pounds or we would go down to the basement...where there are no warm fuzzy memories or fun thoughts.

On Wednesday when we were chatting He reminded me of what He wanted on Friday. A much higher rating for my efforts ( I had given myself a 6 on Monday) and a loss of 2 pounds. I told Him I was uncomfortable with the rating system. We had never really discussed a real system, not what a 1 or a 5 or an 8 would mean. Those numbers can an probably do mean entirely different things to each of us. I continued, saying I would never give myself a 10, that would mean I had done every possible, and I believe there is always room improvement. I could have exercised an extra 10 minutes each day, or cut down more portions more or walked faster...10's, to me were an impossible goal. Master said He wants my best effort, I still was dubious, that sounded like a 10 to me.

When I sent Him my weigh in, He replied good job! There was hope. Master has been very busy with a special project at work, we are managing to squeeze in time for us, but it is a squeeze. This project will go on for 6 months, I am trying to handle it like an adult...but sometimes, I fail at that. Friday was one of those days...I was feeling very vulnerable and needy by the time we met. Master can always tell just by the way I hug Him hello how I am feeling. We spent our time just sitting and cuddling and chatting with Him reassuring me. It was what I needed...I know without a doubt He does His best, He is busy, but sometimes I just let it get to me.

After we chatted a bit, He asked about my rating for this week's effort. I gave Him a look, but He wanted a number. So I said 8, explaining I had really tried harder than I have for the past few weeks, and I seem to be back into the exercise routine. He asked if I thought that we enough to keep me out of the basement. I hoped that He would consider effort over results. Master replied since it was a pound and a half, He would, less than that We would be down there.
He then gave me a week...til this Friday ...to lose the same amount and that would put me a little under my last goal.
Among His many other attributes, He is fair.

Our good-by hug was much better than the hello ones!

Hope you are all having a good holiday weekend...my dad was a proud WWII veteran, let's remember all those who serve for us!

Hugs, abby

Tuesday, May 22, 2012

Girls' weekend was a success!

Girls' weekend was so much fun! Having three generations of girls made for a variety of activities. We had a "mini spa" time....grand-daughter got to have painted toe nails for the first time, she was excited! We went to a children's science museum, took the ferry to the Statue of Liberty, ate out, had a marguerita nite...thank goodness one if us had an early bedtime. We laughed, we played, we were sorry to see it end, but there is still next year.

As an added bonus, I even managed to lose 1 pound! I was careful about portions and food choices, and we did keep busy, and it was worth it!

Yesterday was M/M day ( Monday Maintenance). After some getting caught up chat time, I was naked and kneeling. Master was pleased at the weight loss, but not at the fact that I am still over my last goal, by 2 pounds. He fetched that evil hairbrush, and promised me a hard spanking. As soon as I settled in over His knee, He started with a hand warm-up, and then some easy strokes with the brush, just was I was relaxing into the sensations, I hear, warm-up is over. After several sets, each getting harder to breathe through, Master stops for a chat. Chatting while still OTK tends to be a precarious activity.

Master announces that He wants me back at my goal by this Friday. I remind Him that is 2 pounds, He says He knows. He also reminds me that He has been generous with my time away, allowing me to gain a couple pounds, and celebrate the new addition and enjoy the girl's weekend. It is now time for me to get serious about getting back to the last goal I reached, and move on. I have until Friday, or Friday will be a basement spanking. That got my attention. I pleaded that it was not fair to get a basement spanking if I lose on a weigh in day. Basement spankings are never fun or easy, they are considered a major punishment spanking. I insisted it was not fair, to lose and face a major punishment. Master decided to finish maintenance at that point, tucked me in, and really let that brush fly. It was fast and furious and I was barely breathing.

When He finished, He said if I can say to Him on Friday that I have done my absolute best during this week, He will take the basement visit out of the picture. I consider that kind of a 2 edged sword, but it was somewhat of a concession on His part. It is true that I have been coasting, just happy to be mainly staying around my goal weight. So more of an incentive did get my attention, but I am still feeling it is somewhat unfair. I say that knowing that in a TPE relationship the word "fair" is a tricky one, and does not often apply. I have loss 2 pounds in a week before, hopefully it will happen this week and the whole basement issue will go away. I have been much more conscious of my food choices, and the wii has been stepped up a bit.

Master was rubbing my bottom, and letting His fingers roam while we were discussing the basement issue. By the time we ended the discussion , I was whimpering with need for a permission. Master continued to "explore" and comment on my readiness. I finally hear, that I may cum for my Master and I am off. Master knows all of me, and He played me to a point of multiple, strong orgasms, it took me a while to come back to earth, still my breathing and be able to thank Him. We continued to enjoy each other as my awareness returned, and I was able to concentrate on Master.


It was certainly an amazing ending to M/M, and hopefully Friday will continue with more amazing times, all above the basement.

hugs abby

Thursday, May 17, 2012

On a scale of 1 to 10......

I am leaving early tomorrow morning....as early as I can get my daughter in the car....for our annual "girls" weekend with both my daughters and my oldest grand-daughter (4)!) I am looking forward to it, but it seems like I just got back here.

So, Master declared today weigh in day, instead of Friday. I loss a little over 1/2 pound. A loss is always better than a gain. Master agreed with that philosophy, but wondered if I tried as hard as I could...or should. After our hello hugs, it was kneeling time...Master chose to sit on an ottoman facing me. He grabbed my breasts and proceeded to pull, tug and pinch while we had a little chat. He asked me how hard I had tried to please Him this week, on a scale of 1 to 10. I hate a question like that, I can argue almost any number on that scale. I did wii every day, but not as long as i used to..one day I even walked, or strolled the bike path. I was careful about food choices, but did have some indulgences.

As I was going over my choices Master was still pinching and pulling, and waiting for an answer. Was 8 too high, was 5 too low??? ARGHHH...He prodded me for an answer..so I finally said 6...I think that was a fair evaluation. Master brings my face close to His and asks...why would I not want to give Master my best effort...a 10?? Because it is too hard, because you did not feel like it...why? I had no good answer...

Since I had not good answer, Master's answer was, He was going to spank me hard...not a punishment, but definitely a reminder that He expects more. He pulled out the hairbrush, it has been a while since I had seen it. I went over His lap, and He started with a hand warm up and then used the brush with the bristle side, to create a nice tingling. Just as I was relaxing and thinking ummmm....He started in with the wooden side.

It hurt right from the beginning, not sure if it was because I had just been spanked with the lexan paddle a couple days ago, or He was being more forceful, but I was struggling. He would complete a set, of maybe 25, stop to rub and talk and start in again. Then I felt him tuck me in close...hard and fast He said...it took my breath away, and left me with a very hot stinging bottom. I was then told that being away this weekend does not exempt me from exercise of some type, and is not an acceptable excuse for a gain on Monday....my next spanking could be much harsher.

Master then told me not to regret my answer of 6....I certainly would not want to be less than truthful. Also He reads my daily reports so He knows how much effort I put in, He just wanted to hear me say it.

Master then used His hands and fingers for a much better sensation, He soon had me panting and groaning and making those noises that I cannot believe come from me. He is also talking to me and expecting responses, I am hesitating on the responses....how can a girl have a conversation under those circumstances. Since I am not responding , He takes His hand away, and says no permission, since I am not replying as He wants. I quickly get my wits and figure out what He wants so we can continue. I cum several times....this time Master takes my breath away in a wonderful manner.

Have a great weekend all...I will be having lots of fun...and remembering to do lots of moving!

hugs abby

Tuesday, May 15, 2012

3 weeks is a long time...

Master and I went three weeks without seeing each other. It is the longest time since I don't know when. Between traveling...family and business...work, appointments, etc...real life just kept getting in the way.


But finally, yesterday, Master did not return to work after lunch, it was our time! I have to admit, I was looking forward to it, and not looking forward to it. I returned from my trip having gained a little over 2 pounds, all things considered, not awful, but a gain. Master took the news well, told me to get back on track and He wanted some kind of exercise every day until I was back at my goal. I asked for 5 days a week, but was told every day. My weigh in yesterday was plus a little less than 1 pound. I blamed Mother's day weekend and the fact that I gave myself the weekend off.


Master told me yesterday that when I next blogged I was to include this.....Monday's maintenance was a hard paddling with My lexan paddle....and I let her off easy. I have to add, He is right.


By the time we finally physically connected I was feeling a little loss. My 'voices' returned, and although I was able to argue with them a bit, they did wear me down. When Master and I were first starting on our voyage, when I was feeling very insecure about something, I would wake up in the middle of the night and converse with the voices. That usually ended up in my sending Master an e-mail in the middle of the night, hoping that would help me get back to sleep...and writing about certain things in the middle of the night, was a LOT easier than talking about them in the light of day. No, I did not send am email, but I could feel myself starting to withdraw and did consider picking up a stone or two to re-build some walls.


Master greeted me with hugs and soft talk. Reminding me that I am His, that He takes that very seriously. Soon I was naked and kneeling and being re-claimed, and finally I started to relax and breathe.


Master reminded me that this was a Maintenance Monday, but He was also not happy that I had gained even after I returned home, and that I had not followed His directive on exercise. He hates going backwards.


I was invited over His lap, a concession on His part that I was/am very thankful for...and He even started off with a quick hand warm-up. Then He started in with that darn paddle. Each set was a build-up in speed and power. I was kicking and ouching, and trying to move away, and even told Him once to stop. Not my best behavior. He would stop and talk and calm me and start again. Finally He started on a set and I just lay there, head down, panting, but staying quiet and in place. I hear Master say, finally....acceptance. When He finishes this set, He tells me to ask for another set, saying that I want it to be the hardest yet, so I remember it for a long time, and to say it loudly and as if I mean it. Master knows this is difficult for me, so He gives me a minute or two, and I ask. He agrees and starts with the hardest,
longest set yet. Finally it is over.

We move on to more enjoyable activities. Master remarks that I am already "sloshing" wet, I am so ready for His touch.We start off quickly, and then slowly just enjoy each other. It is good to be together again, and to know I am where I belong.

I did get a strong warning about my next weigh-in, and the consequences of 3 gains in a row. I have been exercising, even twice yesterday....so here's hoping the diet gods are listening!

hugs, abby

Wednesday, May 9, 2012

finally home again!

After spending most of yesterday at 2 airports, I am finally home again! It was a wonderful time. I was able to witness the newest little one's first smiles..so far, she seems to be a very calm, easily contented baby. Her 2 year old sister, is constant motion and everlasting energy, I am one tired grandma! As luck...or maybe no luck...would have it, on the day I returned Master left for a business trip. He had mentioned the possibility last week, then thought He would be here, but then finally had to go. He'll be gone a few days, I have plenty of things to catch up on, but it seems like a long time since we have been together. One my list of to-dos today is to try and catch up on what you all have been up to... hugs abby

Wednesday, May 2, 2012

plus 1!

Yikes, I logged on to get a quick post up and find blogger has gone and updated...I hate change, especially when I barely know what I am doing here! The happy news....new little grand-daughter arrived the day after I got here...great timing! She is beautiful...of course...and very laid back, seems to like to observe what is going on around her. Her "big" sister seems to be adjusting, about as well as a 2 year old can! I am exhausted at the end of each day.... I have been here a little over a week, have a flight out next Tuesday. Master and I have been in touch every day. Until today I was doing quite well, missing Him, but keeping up with my tasks and knowing this is where I need/want to be right now. This afternoon, I felt myself just wanting to touch, smell, feel Him....soon...not soon enough but soon.. I have not been reading many blogs, hardly any, hope you are all doing fine. Will catch up with you soon... Did I mention I got her to smile at me twice today! hugs, abby