Sunday, December 23, 2012

Sadness ...and joy

   Sadness was the day I was supposed to be traveling to my son's house, where my daughter and her family would join us, and we would celebrate Christmas together, then travel to celebrate again,  with my mom, my siblings and their families. My plans changed on Friday; in an early morning phone call i learned that my nephew's 25 year old wife had died during the night. They live where i do. We had been expecting a call that her dad had died, so at first i was confused, but no it was not the dad, but the daughter...most likely a seizure. They  had just closed on a house the day before.  Yesterday, her dad died. There is comfort in the thought that they are together. Later this week, I will be going to a father/daughter funeral. 

  Joy...Last Friday when i returned home after a long emotionally and physically exhausting day, i sat to call my daughter and son. We had been in contact during the day, but they wanted me to call when i got home, and i did need to hear their voices. My daughter first, i tell her that obviously our plans for the holiday have been canceled...she tells they have changed. She and her hubby decided to bring some Christmas joy to 'grandma'...they will be here coming here. I then called my son, and He told me he and his wife had been working on changing their work schedules, they will be leaving for a long drive on Wednesday, to bring Christmas to 'grandma'. I asked if he had spoken to his sister..he had not yet, was going to call her after he talked to me.  
I told him looks like we will be all be together and this lucky 'grandma' will have 4 beautiful little faces with her to remind me of the joy, love, and hope of this holiday..

I won't be around for the next week,
but i wish all of you that same joy, love and hope.
hugs abby

Wednesday, December 19, 2012

It was called maintenance, but......

    I love Christmas, but if we could just find some way to get there without all the stress and busyness..and I am speaking for all of us!

     Our usual M/M day was moved to Tuesday...I have 3 family birthdays in December, Master has 1....there was just no time on Monday. Tuesday, Master was determined to squeeze it in me...well...not so much.  So, I asked if maybe we could just chat, talk, instead of spanking. Surprisingly, He agreed. I felt relieved and we talked..not about anything big, just sharing.

     As we are chatting He reaches in to try to get to my breast. I say try because I had a bra, a tee shirt and a sweat shirt...I hate being cold! He chuckled as He started to peal the layers away. As we continued to chat he was having His way with my breast, reminding me...they are His, not mine, and He gets to 'enjoy' them whenever He wishes.

     When He has had enough, He starts to move downward and meets up with my jeans. I am told to unbuckle and unzip, He reaches in and soon the chatter is becoming sporadic, and it is becoming hard to concentrate on mere words.  I am reminded that I don't have a permission...i am sooo close... being observant, He tells me to cum for Him... and I, being obedient do, twice, just for good measure.  When we are leaving He tells me not to make Him regret that He did not heat up my bottom.  I laugh. 

    Problem is I woke up this morning feeling like something was missing. A tender bottom, a determination that I did not want a harder spanking than maintenance, a lack of being spanked.
i have been 'antsy' all day....i have such mixed feelings about this neediness....but it is there. 
i have not told Master, but I don't think i will suggest a chat instead of a spanking least for a while.

While we were chatting, Master told me to amend my rules list...I left out 2 rules..

~i am to be clean shaven for Him...which means always.  This rule came about on the first day that we 'officially' started our M/s journey. On that day He shaved me, i was soooo...nervous and kept my eyes closed. Now i remember it fondly, and think it would be nice to re-enact it.

~not more 'granny' panties. The rule at first was none when we were together. I had started to occasionally wear lacy, more sexier ones, and He liked it and wanted me to continue...not too mention many of my granny ones were also too big!  Then a couple months ago He 'suggested' that i start to replace the granny ones, and work my way towards having them all replaced, which I have been doing. ( I bought a special pair, for the end of this week;)

The cuffs are also being used more. Master has now given me both the ankle and wrist set, and I am to wear them both to bed. (This started about a week ago). One night He had me clip the wrist ones together, for as long as I could sleep, once they woke me up i could un-clip them. I actually made it most of the night.  Last night, i was told to clip the ankle ones together..I was more nervous about that, i move a lot at night, but there was just enough give that i could get comfortable. They did wake me a couple times, but i was able to get back to sleep. 

Hope you all remember to breathe this week, enjoy the shining lights and the smiles on the faces of the little ones, and remember, it is about memories and love...

hugs abby

Monday, December 17, 2012

On His 'naughty' list

     I started this post last Friday afternoon, turned on the television and typed in the title and....the world stopped. Like most everyone I spent a lot of this weekend with tears in my eyes and praying for all involved...the ones who lost a part of their family, the little ones who saw and heard things no one should be witness to, the the first responders, for all of us.  May the true spirit of Christmas shine on everyone.

    Not Santa's naughty list....hmmm maybe that one too., but Master's! My youngest daughter's birthday was on Saturday, we had plans to celebrate, but then needed to change  those plans to Friday. I emailed Master on Wednesday, and left a voice message Thursday noontime. Not explaining everything, just saying I needed to talk to Him about something. Master is usually very good at responding to such a I waited, and the longer I waited the louder that devilish voice in head became....He's too busy for you...etc.etc.etc.

    Thursday night, I did not text a good night message...early Friday morning I get a text from Master, what had happened, why no good night? He was not pleased, I was told to spend the day in my room thinking about how He would punish me. When I finally explained about my daughter's birthday, He relented, but said we would get together first, and 'settle up'.

   Of course, Master wanted an explanation, why had i not text or called Him again? ( we have had this conversation before). I hate to be a pest to keep bothering Him when I know how busy He is....Master took a deep breath and repeated, I am not a pest, I am His submissive, He wants to hear from me, He wants to be there for me, He expects me to stay in contact with Him. I know all of this, and we both agree i am getting better at disregarding that evil voice that tells me otherwise. He then asked, why no good night, i said figured it was a small thing and.....He added...might go unnoticed?? He reminded me I had just posted a list of my rules, and that was on the list, was it not? I had to admit, it was.

     Master had me bend over the ottoman, He had chosen one of His heavy paddles, and said since there was a birthday celebration after this , i would get my daughter's birthday spanking. Luckily she is my youngest...turned Master declared 34, one to grow on. They were hard, but not the hardest, and Master did put is hand on my back to help me stay in place after the first few. The last 4 were much harder, but I knew He was being generous. 

      I was still over the ottoman, waiting for permission to get up, when Master says....where do I want you now?  I was trying to figure out what He wanted, when He repeated the question, and as i looked at Him , I quickly got to my knees, between His legs.

      Most always after a punishment, there is no fun play time, and certainly no permissions for me. Master must have been in the Christmas spirit, when I got up, He invited me over His lap.  He started to use His hand on my 'delightfully red bottom', and soon had me purring and panting.  I even did get permissions!  

      My daughter's birthday lunch had me both squirming and smiling...and determined to stay off that naughty list!

  hugs abby

Thursday, December 13, 2012

10 years ago today.....

.......I met the man i now call Master! Oh...the words Master or submissive never entered the conversation, that would have made for a very short meeting. But i knew from the beginning, He was a gentleman, we had similar backgrounds, and the word spanking did enter the conversation! We had been talking about our common 'interest' before that first meeting.

.....In my mind i imagined that i might get to finally find out what it is like to be spanked....and that would be it...really! Sometimes being wrong is sooooooooooo good!

     So in 10 years i have learned a few things about my Master...

      He is a man of His word, and can be trusted...always
      He does not run when we meet a 'bump' in the road, or the going gets a little rough

      He has a wonderful 'kinky' imagination

      He has a hard hand....and a soft heart

      He can use His hands is many ways

      He wants what is best for me

      He is always willing to listen

      He is there..or here....whenever i need Him

      He can make me laugh even when i truly doubt that is possible

      He has taken me on the most wonderful, unexpected journey, fulfilling my fantasies..and 
      even some fantasies i did not know i had!

     That is 10 one for each year...i don't what Him to get a swelled head...LOL!

      Thank You Master!!!!

     hugs abby

Tuesday, December 11, 2012

My rules to live by.....

     I believe that all things in life have an ebb and flow....Master and I seem to be in a flow zone at the moment. He is thinking of new ways to support my submission. When we were chatting yesterday and the topic of rules came up. He decided He wanted me to make a list of my rules are a strange thing....for me...rules start out as new tasks i have to remember and then end up just being part of my routine. I decided to post the rules....and to add my comments to them.

    Also remember it has been almost 10 years for Master and I, these rules have been added one at a time, and adjusted as necessary. Here's hoping I don't forget too many!  Except for the first couple these are not in chronological order....I am not that organized.

     ~ email Master a daily report....this started out as a food diary, before we were M/s, to help me lose weight. It listed what I ate each day and how long I had exercised. It has changed over the years, at times I have had to add a calorie count. I still send includes a task of my choosing that I do for Master each day. Also anything else we might not have had to chance to talk about during the day. 

   ~no cumming without permission. This was my first rule, when we started with D/s. I may play all i want, just not cum.  I did cross that line a few times early on....but have not in a long time. 

   ~ no sarcasm, in person or in writing....i have carried the title of 'queen of sarcasm' in quiet a few circles. Master considered it disrespectful   and not amusing.  Respect is big for me...He has earned it and deserves it, so I worked hard on this one.

  ~Text a good morning message every morning. Most mornings i do this while still in bed, it includes any plans I have for the day.

  ~Text a good nite message. At first i got into the habit of sending it at 10 every nite, except when i occasionally went to bed earlier. Master asked if i really went to bed at the stoke of 10 every nite, I admitted it made it easy to remember to send the message. I now send it just as I climb into bed. Recently i have been told to add if i am wearing cuffs.

~Send in a weigh-in report every Friday. For a long time I had to send one Monday and Friday. Since i reached my last goal Master has finally agreed to a once a week weigh in . I am allowed 2 pounds above my goal weight, before there is trouble!

 ~A lunch time reminder at noon every day. This is fairly recent, and started when Master was assigned a new large project at work with a short deadline. I actually had a problem with this at first...left like i was telling Him to go to lunch. I am doing what He asks...most days it is a call, sometimes a text....most days i remember

 ~I need permission to make plans  for going anyplace. This actually sounds a lot more restrictive that it is.  At first I just had to ask for permission every day when I was in town. I used to ask for anything i might do....and Master then added, if I ask and receive permission and don't go, I have to let Him know...( i was not pleased with this one.) Also a permission is only good for one day....yes, sometimes i do use a perceived loop hole.  I rarely get a no, and have a 10 minute rule..after 10 minutes i have a yes. Emergencies are of course exempt. About a year ago, Master added, that I have to ask permission before i make definite plans to be away. He wanted me to think about how long i would be gone, and if i should try to adjust. I did get punished for this one soon after it became a rule. Again, He does not veto family trips...we both value family time. Just recently Master has added a 'tax' to any long trips i plan. The first week is tax free.....5 swats with the paddle for every day up to 2 weeks, 10 swats per day, for the third week. This went into effect after my most recent 3 week trip. I have made Holiday plans...I will be gone 1 week! 

 ~ Earlier this year when I was about to leave for some time with the grands, Master put an R (for His first initial), on my thigh with a marker. I was to keep it up every morning. When I returned, Master decided that i should continue. I did get punished for not keeping it up is a really bad idea to have Master punish twice for the same infraction....and am still 'tatooing' the 'R' every morning.

  ~My most recent rule is wearing wrist cuffs to bed at night. (When i am away if i am not sharing a room with a grand-child) . I love those cuffs, so Master gave them to me, when I left for a recent 3 week time away....the smell, waking up and having them was/is all good.  When I returned Master decided to continue the  practice at home....:).  He is in the process of adjusting, this past weekend, He had me clip them together one night, and last night He told me to put one on a wrist and one on an ankle. 

I think that covers it, if i have left anything out, i am sure i will be letting you know!

Monday, December 10, 2012

It's Monday so.......

    It's maintenance day.  Master is still on a quest to get my tolerance level back  up, so it was OTK with the hairbrush.  Just as I was starting to squirm, Master announces He is still in warm up mode.....not what I wanted to hear..I was thinking He should be about  done. I did manage to settle in go with the pain for a while, then I started to squirm and ouch loudly, a signal that I am wanting it to end. Master thinks that wanting a spanking to end, is when it really begins!

     I got into a bit of trouble last week. Some of you will identify with this....Master and I are in touch several times a day. Last Wednesday, a friend and I had a girl's casino day..all day.
I was in touch with Master in the morning and at lunch. When I got back in the evening, I thought I  need to let Master know I am  home, but got involved in other things. I did send Him a good night text, but it was early, as I had not slept well the night before and was tired. The next morning, I sent my morning text and did not get a reply...which rarely happens. I called at lunch..well after lunch, I lost track of the time, left a voice message and did not get a reply. By evening I was wondering, is He sick, in the hospital, did something happen to a family member...When I start to let myself go to that place where all things bad are possible, I also retreat within myself. I did not send a good night message that night, and did not hear from Master.

    I woke early the next morning, and read the obits...nope He was not listed. I sent an early the obits, You were not listed.  He replied nope...and wondered how my casino day went....a hint that He was still waiting for that report. When I saw Him that day, He let me know that getting a text that He was not in the obits was not the best way to start His day. I replied that  of all the texts I had thought of, that was the nicest.....and most respectful. He was not impressed, and my bottom paid the price. Why do we go there??

     For a little while now, I have been sleeping with Master's cuffs at night. They are nice and comfy. leather....yummy smell...lined with a lamb's skin type of material. They are also nice and warm during these cold nights. He had me bring them on one of my longer times away.....and decided I should just keep wearing them every night once I returned.  Last night I was told to clip them together when I went to bed, and keep them on until they woke me...not necessarily all night.  It did take me a while to get comfy and fall asleep. I woke up around 1 AM....a little confused, but soon realized it was the cuffs. I had no problem falling asleep again. Woke up again a couple hours later, and this time I unclipped the cuffs and then went back to sleep. Master wants to slowly work to where I have them clipped all night. Tonight I was told to wear one on my right wrist and one on my right ankle.....He is moving into new territory...and I am glad to go along with Him!

   Master wants me to write out a list of my rules....if I am going to write a list, I figure it might as well be a blog i will be back tomorrow..

hugs abby


Sunday, December 9, 2012

Which are you....LOUD or quiet??

   When I was reading at Aisha's   this morning,  she was writing how she is a loud, moving, whiny spankee. I had to laugh, since Master and I were just discussing this...while he was applying the brush to my bottom....solely for His pleasure.

     He is trying to build my tolerance, since being away for 3 weeks, is a lot like starting over, as far as my bottom is concerned.  After the first 2 rounds, I was kicking my legs, and trying to jiggle away. He pulled me back in, and asked why I was being so quiet...I almost always am. He said it was okay to be loud and say ouch and and let Him know that He was being effective.  Round three was even longer and harder, and yes..I finally did start to be much more vocal and loud. He chuckled, and least now I know I am making an impression...and HE was leaving a red hot bottom. 

       It did not take me long after meeting Master to let it all out...and be VERY  LOUD when He is allowing me to cum....I learned early on, there was no way I could hold that in....and  often wondered if all the noise was really coming from me? It was, and I have come to accept my wantonness as far as Master is concerned...and He seems to enjoy it :). So now I am wondering....which are you....loud or quiet when it comes to being spanked. I am also wondering...if I get louder will He stop sooner??

     We were also discussing the spanking...or little Master described it on The Bang Theory.  When I said, there are people out there who think the do not get spanked hard enough.
He stopped for a minute and asked if I was one of them. I quickly assured Him, that I am not....when Master has spanked, you know you have been spanked, I always come away feeling like I was well spanked..sometimes a little too well. Master said He would not want to disappoint me..I assured Him He was doing just fine, no need to change...unless He wanted to try softer spankings...He thought that was pretty funny...go figure.

     Today was cookie baking day...I now 8 different kinds of cookies waiting in my freezer. I like to stick to the traditional....cut-outs, spritzes, and chocolate-peanut butter roll ups, while my daughter likes to add a few new kinds to the mix. It is a fun day...but exhausting..If I get my act together earlier next year..I will join that cookie exchange...that I "stole" a few recipes from this year.

      I have been lagging in posting lately....I am blaming all of you. There is so much good stuff to read lately, I spend most of my computer time reading, and leaving a few comments! 

Have a great week...
hugs abby

Monday, December 3, 2012

Finally...back to M&M

     Last week was a long week....happily this week is starting off much better!

     I ended up taking a quick trip to see my 4 year old grand-daughter in a school Christmas show, and singing and signing a Christmas carol with the children's choir at a tree lighting.
It was worth the trip. I left around lunch time on Friday. When I saw Master on Wednesday, He had said we would meet before lunch. When I sent in my 2 pounds....His reply was OK see you after lunch. What followed was a few texts which were confusing to both of of the many downfalls of texting, in trying to keep it short, one must make assumptions. We finally did get to talk, just before I left. I was 'antsy', it had been a long time since a hard spanking...and I needed I did not express that to Master.

    I think we had both waited long enough...too long...this morning I finally was kneeling and naked with Master claiming me, massaging, rubbing, pulling, pinching...all of it...Finally I was feeling like His submissive, and I could actually feel my body soften. My 2 pound gain put me 1/2 pound above my 'wriggle room', and although Master said it was not acceptable, it was also not had been 4 weeks.

   Then, I was finally back over Master's lap. He reached into my bag, and pulled out the short strap. It is short, but it is hard to manage OTK. One side of my bottom was definitely getting the worst of it.  After 2 sets, Master asked if it left like He was spanking only did.  He reached back onto the bag and pulled out the thin frog paddle. It is a great bottom warmer, it makes lots of noise, and leaves a nice sting. I could feel myself getting damp, then wet, as Master used it slowly, quickly, alternating sides, concentrating on one side, then the other.
Master checked me again, and chuckled...He loves that He can get me almost dripping, in very short order.

    Master then said it was maintenance time....and maintenance needs to be a hard spanking, a way to keep me focused on what I need to be doing to please Him. He decided on His belt, I was told to lean over the sofa, head down, bottom way up. It was the moment I was dreading and had been a long time between hard spankings...about 1 month.  Master's belt is one of my favorite spanking 'tools'....form the  sound of it being pulled through the loops to the smell of leather, and finally the swish, and then the kiss of the leather...I did struggle at first, and for a bit, before I could settle somewhat, I am not sure how many Master gave me, but my bottom was hot and very stinging....and lots of other parts of me were very hot! Master then asked me what I thought 1/2 pound over my limit had earned me. He waited, as I quickly had the debate in my head...what is enough, what is the least I can get away with??? I finally said, 10 more, Master said 10 more on each, just 10 (a girl has to try!). He said He could change His target to my thighs, so I quickly decided that 10 on each cheek sounded fair. After 10 slightly harder ones on each side, and Master was telling me to kneel between His legs.

    It had been a long time since I had been offered Master's cock....I started off slowly, but soon it all came back to me...LOL. Master then had me kneel away from Him , head to the floor presenting my pussy to Him, and I was filled, and pushing back, til I was told to be still til He told me I could move. I tried, but soon I just had to push back and beg for permission, and then I knew I was there.....a strong, down in my gut, loud, orgasm....followed by another couple.  Finally everything that I had been needing, craving. 

    hugs abby

ps...I would like to add my email address to the blog, have looked for a location, cannot find one. Help??  Thanks!

Wednesday, November 28, 2012

It's been one of those weeks :( know how frustrating it is when you have a day when nothing goes as planned...or 2 days....or 2 1/2 days...

    I woke up Monday after a great night's sleep....ready to to complete my long to-do list, and spend some  morning time with Master. I did things around the house and went out to go and meet Master. I use my daughter's car on most days, since her car is compact, and she nannies 3 boys under 5.  I get into the car....and nothing...just a lot of clicking. The only thing working is the radio..... grrrreat.

   I call her to see if she has been having she said worked fine last time I used it. I quickly call Master to let Him know, that I have a problem. He says it is the battery, and offers to come over and give me a jump. I know He has lots on His plate, so I say I will just call AAA and be on my way.  Call my daughter to find out she has let her AAA lapse....yes she is an adult!
I go into the house and feel quite cold, to the point where I am shivering....I sit for a drink, and feel like I have been run over be a train. Yes seems my grand-daughters sent me home with a gift of......germs. When my daughter gets home we deal with getting a new battery and I get home and fall into bed.

    Tuesday I wake up and just want to roll over and go  back to sleep. I have a doctor's appointment, one I made 6 months ago, and I think how strange would it be to call and cancel because I am sick. So I let Master know how I am feeling and that I am heading to the docs. The good news is no infection, just that wonderful flu/cold...and yes I did get my flu shot. I let Master know what the doc said, He asks if I feel up to a visit....I do not, I just want to go back to bed. Which I do....and stay there.

     Today, I wake up feeling human and with some energy. I give Master the good news and we arrange to meet after His dentist appointment this afternoon. I get into my daughter's car....and nothing....AGAIN!!!  I don't know if I should laugh or cry...I call Master and tell Him, we need to wait another day....but He is not agreeing....He is on His way over. Thank goodness...I so needed to see Him and feel Him and talk to get the picture!

    We spend a lot of time just hugging and chatting, getting caught up on each other and just being happy to be back. I tell Him 3 weeks is way too long, He reminds me, this is my last tax free time away....and He does not think I can afford another 3 weeks....I am kneeling by Him, He is re-claiming, reminding me that I am where I belong, with whom I belong to...He asks if I am up to a welcome back spanking, I am quickly over His lap. He uses His hand, but I am soon squirming, it has been a long time, and His hand can be very hard. He stops to rub, and I am soon squirming and wanting a permission....I am told to slow down, as He continues to spank. He finally reaches in to see just how ready I am....and boy am I ever ready....I am pleading for a permission...and get it...and the orgasms and just rolling out of me. Finally I am laying quietly over His lap, waiting for my body parts to recover form that 'jello' feeling. After more hugs and chatting it is time to return to the real world of getting that darn car of tonight it should be better be!

   Master reminds me that I have to weigh in on Friday, I try to talk Him out of it, but it is a no-go,,,He has never agreed to a free weight in....a girl just has to try. 

    Master learned something from my answers to the Liebster...He never know I am fluent in French...I am thinking I should be able to use that to my advantage one of these days...LOL...maybe not!

   hugs....hope you all are having a better week than how mine started..

  And...I want to start the exercise challenge...I just need to get more energy and less coughing...


Sunday, November 25, 2012

Yes, I am really back!

  I got back today.....I am tired but I just had to say 'hello' to all of you, I missed you!

  My first week away went well, time with the 2 little ones...3 year old and 7 month old...lots of fun, getting re-educated on all the Disney princesses, going to the park, looking forward to nap times and hoping that I could get both to sleep at the same time. After all, I am a grandma, and I do not have the energy of a 30 or 40 year old! I also squeezed in a 2 nights at my mom's. She is doing well and we got to shop and have lunch out and enjoy each other's company. 

 Week two, and croup struck....that awful cough that keeps everyone up all nite. My daughter in law took a couple nights off, but it was a very long week, even with the 3 year old being a trouper. A sick child really tugs at the heart strings! Luckily the younger one got a cold, but that was it.  Week three was somewhat back to normal, and Thanksgiving. I was very ready to come  back home...Master and I were in touch daily, and He is a great long distant cheerleader!

 I kept up with you all for about the first week, then just did not have the energy or time...but that means I have lots of good reading ahead of me this week!

I was very surprised and pleased to find out I had been nominated for the Liebster Award! 
Thanks to Kitty at one nomination. I will answer her questions first, even though she threatened to add to Master's away tax!.....Also thanks to Minelle at who also gave me a nod!

Kitty's questions:

1 - What’s your favorite meal?
      Has to be sea food, probably lobster!

2 - What do you like best about being kinky?
      Tough one! that it is a great way to discover new ways to have fun...and I have discovered a part of e that for a long time, I never knew was there.

3 - Is there a sexual position you haven’t tried that you’d like to?
      Hmmm....yes, but as my body gets less agile, I am thinking I may have make some adaptations.

4 - If you could live in any time era, which one would you pick, and why?
      Maybe the 50's...when life was simpler, and people seemed more connected...

5 -Do you prefer giving or receiving oral sex? Why?
      Either way, it's a win/win

6 – What is your favorite implement?
     Large leather flogger,,,always has been, and probably always will be.

7 – What is your favorite position?
   OTK, usually, but not for the flogger, flat on bed is best for that.

8 - How long have you been in a D/s relationship?
      I have known Master for over 10 years, D/s for about 7 of those.

9 - How long have you been "into" spanking?
      Master gave me my first spanking 10 years ago, but I fantasized about it long before then.

10 -very first boy/girlfriend - what age, any details you remember, etc.
      Around 12,  a neighbor, we were playing hide and seek with others in the neighborhood, and he found me first..ignoring the others! It did not last long.

11 – (My own question) Did you ever see anything so beautiful that it made you cry?
      My children and grandchildren at birth...and still when I see them in a recital or show.

11 random facts about me...

1.  I am fluent in French, even in grade school, all the classes we had in the afternoon were taught in French.
2.  I attended an all girl's high school, only 22 of us in our graduating class.
3.  I was the first of my large extended family to move out of the little town we all lived mother sent me the job ads for years.
4.  I love going to to see live theater, especially musicals.
5.  I never wanted a Kindle, then my sister gave me one...I love it!
6.  I almost always have my Christmas shopping done before Dec. 1st
7. One year I cross stitched gifts for everyone.
8. I love to gamble!
9. I took piano lessons for years.
10. I wish I could sing
11. I  have always lived where there is usually lots of snow...and I hate snow!

It is getting late, I still need to make a grocery list for the morning and finish unpacking.... is good to be back!

Saturday, November 10, 2012


  First an apology...I am going to break one of my long standing rules (one I gave myself...not from Master), and not write individual comments to all who were nice enough to leave me a comment yesterday. Honestly, I logged on to leave a quick comment on each, but quickly realized I am just too tired.....keeping up with a 3 year old and a 6 month old is not easy, but exhausting! So please accept this general thanks this once....THANK YOU ALL...I loved hearing from all of you!

hugs abby

Friday, November 9, 2012


    I am in a train station, leaving from visiting my mom, going to spend time with  my grand-daughters....but I just had to sqeeze in a post for today!

....To all of you out there that we refer to affectionately as 'lurkers',,,,HELLO!  For a long time I was one of you, then one day, I dared to leave a comment and got a response! a conversation,,,,,and from that conversation I have become a member of a warm and accepting community that I now think of as friends! It really is worth it.

    I always try to respond to comments, so you will feel welcomed, and I love 'meeting' new friends.  If you are not ready....lurk on.....all are welcomed.

     OOPS..I hear a train whistle......Happy LOL day to all my fellow bloggers!

hugs abby

Friday, November 2, 2012

Sitting Gingerly!

      I am taking a break from packing, I am flying out to go help son and daughter-in- law with some babysitting.  He has to study for a job related test...and possible promotion.. and it is hard to study with a 3 year old and a 7 month old... while I am there I am going to take a few days and take the train up to see my mom, it's been a couple months since I have seen  her.

     Master and I had our 'good-by' session today. When I was kneeling for Him, I kept leaning in against Him, just wanting to get closer. He chuckled and asked if I was just trying to hide my, really...would I????  It did not deter Him, He grabbed on, and kept hanging on for most our play time.

     After a very nice hand warm up it was time to play the dice game. Remember? There are 3 dice one for positions, one has numbers (1--30), and the last list spanking 'toys, and all have one wild side. Last time we played, I rolled lots of leather and the flogger came into play quite a few times, so I was excited to try again.

     Yeah...ever hear of the law of averages...I hate math! My first 3 rolls, were all high numbers...23, 30, and 25......2 were the between was Master's belt, which was a welcome relief. Most of my rolls were above 20, and lots of wooden spoon, cane, paddle rolls. 
My love for the game was bottom was smoldering. Finally when we done to the last 2 rolls I rolled flogger! and 30! standing in the corner..not my favorite position, but at last the flogger. Master said since in was only 30, He would have to make them count....and He did, but it was so nice, to have the feel of the leather all over my back.

   My last roll was a light paddle, and OTK...a nice place to end. The roll was in the 20's but Master loss count and went way over....

    After each spank, Master would stop to rub and, of course, check to see if I was enjoying...After the OTK, Master made sure that I was well lubricated, and then announced....

    Time for a vigorous (his word) strapping, one that you will remember for a while. I was not pleased, but got up and over the ottoman, and have to admit, after the first set, I remembered that I do love that large strap of His. I am not sure how many, but my bottom was red, welted, and on was the rest of me. 

     When Master 'checked' this time, I was more than ready, and He let me soar, and held me as I landed. Master reminded me that I am traveling with a 'tool box' of things I need to keep up with so I remember that I am His. He also said, if I do not let Him know every day that I am thinking of Him, and using my tool box, He will step in and give me tasks, that need to be done within a time frame...I might want to avoid that. 

     For those of you that remember the new 'tax rule' for my time does not apply this time, since this trip was planned before Master put it into effect....thank goodness!  

    I will be reading to keep up with all of you, but my computer time will be limited, so comments will also be limited. 

    Be good all....but not too good :)

   hugs abby

Wednesday, October 31, 2012


  I could not think of a title, so I decided boo was appropriate for today. I really wish someone, who is way more creative than I am, would publish a book, or at least a list, of blog titles!

  Happy Halloween...I am pretty sure I am going to have left over candy...any ideas on what to do with it, besides eating it , of course!

   I finally heard from my daughter, no phone or internet, loss power for a bit, but everyone is doing OK:) phew!  Hope all of you along the East coast are finding ways to cope ! My thoughts and prayers are certainly with you.

  Yesterday was maintenance day. I got an early message from Master...see you at asking if I was up to it or if that was good for me. It immediately started to chase the 'blahs' that I had on Monday away.

    After some  hugging and talk  about 'Sandy', Master asked what the problem was on Monday...why the sour mood? He was not all that happy that I kept it to myself, and caused it myself....

     I was soon kneeling and He was re-claiming and reminding me of who I am, and who I belong to. He was pulling and pinching my breasts, watching me breathe through the pain.
Finally He stopped and invited me over His lap. He started out with His hand, deliberate spanks, increasing in intensity. He 'checks' to see how I am responding...and then continues the warm-up with the wooden hair brush. Warm-up is what He calls it, feels much more like a 'heat-up' to me.

      He checks again, and of course I am getting wetter....sometimes I wish I could control that, just to see His reaction.  He then asks what He had promised me for today. I know what He wants to hear, but I hesitate. He asks again,,,I say maintenance...not the answer He is waiting for. He starts to tap the brush and asks again, I know better than to make Him ask a third time....a long, hard spanking, Sir. That is the answer He is looking for and He is and hard. He stops and tells me I have permission to 'cum', if I can. He then makes sure that I am close enough that I want to......He tells me to keep my legs open and apart. The brush starts to fly takes me a couple rounds, but I can feel myself getting closer, lifting my bottom asking for more....and it happens, my body takes over, I am taking off, and land in a spent, happy place. 

     Master stops to rub and talk and tell me what a good girl I am. Then I I am going to spank you for the mood you created yesterday, and for not opening up to me....this time you may not cum. He is spanking hard and fast again, and does not stop .....and  I am no longer in that 'zone'. He finally stops and asks if He has made His point...He has!

    He then directs me between His legs, to express my submissiveness, share some cuddling and hugging, and be at peace. 

    My bottom was tingling all nite, but my sour mood was gone, Master knows me so well.


Monday, October 29, 2012

More submissive questions

    It is blowing and raining outside...the wind gusts have really picked up and not reached their peak. But I am warm and the power is still on, so things are good. To all of you along the East coast who are in worse shape, my thoughts and prayers are with you.

    I made a last minute, quickly decided trip to see my 4 year old grand daughter over the weekend. She was planning her own Halloween party and had called to invite me, I initially said I could not go, but then decided to surprise her. She was so excited to see me, and we had lots of fun, bobbing for apples, and turning each other into 'mummies', among other activities. It was worth the drive there!

   Today was supposed to be M/M day, but I felt out of it for most of the day, physically and emotionally. Maybe I am just over tired. No M/M, not sure when we will get to it...not even sure how I feel about that.

    25.  Are there items or rituals that represent or help you express your submission.

            Yes, and this seems like a repeat question to me. Guess my mood still is not the best...LOL.  Kneeling and doing a daily task for Master are 2 'rituals" that stand out.  He is always looking for ways to keep me focused and focused.

26.  What are the qualities you  seek in a dominant partner and why? Are some qualities deal breakers?

      I really had no idea I was looking for a dominant partner when I met Master. I got very lucky.
I feel that a dominant should be comfortable with His role and sure of himself, not a lot of second guessing and wavering. He should also be willing to listen , not always necessarily agree, but really listen, and be open to some discussion. Consistency ranks high, other wise it all tends to get confusing. Dominant's hold their submissive's well being in their is a big responsibility.

Stay safe everyone!
hugs abby

Thursday, October 25, 2012

A Correction...and an interesting conversation...

   First thing Master tells me this morning....did I know I had fibbed?  My mind is racing....seems I answered no to the meme when I should have said yes.  I have had sex outside...recently, and more than once...not sure what got into me.  I am going to re-check the other answers when I am done here.  One more yes...Yeah for me! (sex on a rooftop??  all I can think of is...would have to be Santa!)

   My shopping this morning was highly successful. I have been looking for matching PJ's for the grands...its a family tradition. The sizes are getting quite varied...from 5 to 9 months and I was not having much luck.  I walked by a store I only sometimes shop in, and saw the sign....everything in store on could I not go in. To my surprise..I found footed sleepers in all the same Christmas design, in the correct sizes!!!  At the check-out, when I was asked if I had found everything, I said yes, and explained. She said, she had been in another store, and saw some for us..adults. I said, I would be way tooo hot!  She agreed, but then asked if I remembered the ones from 'out time' that had the drop seat in the back. I did and said maybe for a fun adult PJ party...her reply..perfect would make it more fun and interesting.  Wonder is she was thinking the same thing I was as I walked out???

  Today is gorgeous...75 and sunny..and I am going out for a long walk....

  hugs abby

Wednesday, October 24, 2012

M/M..maintenance and a 'meme'

     Today was maintenance day. Maintenance is pretty much like a ritual, or as close as we get.
We start with me kneeling, naked, Master touching, claiming every part of me, while we usually end up chatting quietly.

     Over His lap, for a hand warm-up. Then a warm up with the  hair brush...Master's version of a warm up, anyway.  Then a round of much  harder smacks, not sure how many, maybe 50.
Master stops for a little rubbing and some chatting, asking me why we have maintenance, and why does He spank me so I will feel it for a while. Then Master asks me to ask Him for a final round of really hard ones, ones that I will really remember. I hesitate......He says, it is hard to ask isn't it? I nod.....after a minute, Master says it should be easy. "Easy?" I ask...will it requires trust that I will not give you more than you can take. UGH...I do trust, but our versions of what I can...or maybe take are not always in agreement. He doesn't wait, and starts a second round, stops to announce last 10...hard ones...and finally maintenance is over. Master had checked how 'wet' I was after His warm-up, and then again when we were done, His chuckle told me..and I know...that my 'moistness' had increased.  After a couple permissions, I was getting dressed and asked for permission to shop the mall tomorrow. Master gave it, but also said He would be checking my credit card balance before Christmas, so I should be careful. I said, before???, you could wait til after...His grin told me, it will be before.

    If you have done any blog hopping today , you already know this 'meme' is making the rounds. You have to answer simply yes or no, with no explanations..

Taken a picture naked? Yes
Made money illegally? No
Had a one night stand? No
Been in a fist fight? No
Slept with your best friend? No
Had sex in a public place? Yes
Ditched work to have sex? No
Slept with a member of the same sex? No
Seen someone die? Yes
Ran from the police? No
Woke up somewhere and not remember how you got there? No
Worn your partners unmentionables? No
Fallen asleep at work? Yes
Used toys in the bedroom? Yes
Ran a red light? Yes
Been fired? No
Been in a car accident? Yes
Pole danced or done a striptease? No
Loved someone you shouldn't? Yes
Sang karaoke? Yes
Done something you told yourself you wouldn't? Yes
Laughed so hard you peed your pants? Yes
Caught someone having sex? Yes
Kissed a perfect stranger? Yes
Shaved your partner? No 
Given your private parts a nickname? Yes
Ever gone in public without underwear? Yes
Had sex on a roof top? No
Played chicken? No
Mooned/flashed someone? Yes
Do you sleep naked? No
Blacked out from drinking? No
Felt like killing someone? Yes
Had sex more than 5 times in one day? No
Been with someone because they were in a band? No
Taken 10 shots of liquor in a day? No
Shot a gun? No
Gone outside naked? No

Hmm can't get rid of the red no.....tried.

hugs abby

Tuesday, October 23, 2012

thank you Bonnie!

Thank You Bonnie!

I don't know how she does it, but she keeps her blog list updated...what a list it is! She manages to make everyone feel welcome and.....'normal'! She is a wonderful asset to our community and I am so  happy that we appreciate what a friend she is! Enjoy your special day...calls for a special spanking?!
hugs abby

Monday, October 22, 2012

My morning text...

    ..I have felt myself over the last couple days withdrawing, going within myself, trying to stop myself, knowing that I can not do it alone.   My morning text to Master was ..I need to feel your control and dominance...I don't think I have ever sent a text like that. I used to send middle of the night emails, but was never quite so honest in what I was trying to say. Master's response was simply...Oh Yes!

    I picked a very busy day for both of us, but we carved out time just before lunch. I actually stayed fully dressed, but that did not stop Master from having at least one hand touching my breast, and then playing with my pussy...the whole time.  He did most of the talking, telling me that no matter what I am..or am not wearing...where I am...I am short...ALWAYS!  He said wearing wet panties all day should be a good reminder. 

   I brought up the tax reform post and your comments. He said to let you all know His view..
  1. He is very generous in letting me go off on my trips. He has never said no, and has never restricted my time..(except for when my dad died....I was never away for more than 2 weeks).
I agree He is generous with His permissions.

  2..  It is not good for Us, or me, when I am gone for so long. His preference would be to always have me here and available, He misses me way too much when it is a 3 week gap.

  3..He did change His original plan...He agreed to 1 week with no penalty, He reduced the second week to 50 swats, and since they will be earned in stages, depending on how many, I will get them in stages.

   4..He has left my options open, He just wants me to consider "us", before I automatically agree.

   All this time He is 'priming' my pussy, I am listening, but trying to keep breathing, and to keep myself calm enough so I don't cum without permission.  Master says, maybe keeping me 'simmering' (aisha, I though of you!), will be my maintenance for this week. I could ask for daily permissions, and He would think on it. 

   In the end, He gave me permission to cum, and of course I did. He reminded me to keep those same panties on all day....and that no, this was not maintenance for this week.  He had worked His magic, He came to my rescue, made time, said what I needed to hear. I came home at peace, knowing that being His is what calms my soul. 

   hugs abby

Sunday, October 21, 2012

"tax reform"

     Shopping was highly successful, had coupons and found lots of great sales, and am excited about what I bought! Wrapping is also done..took all afternoon, and a bit...or maybe more...of wine...but packages are wrapped and ready to be delivered..HO HO HO!

   Thanks for those of you who commented on my last post....I decided I should explain a bit more about why I feel Master instituted the new 'tax law'.  Kitty over at  had some questions that really speak to the matter.

    Do I come home stressed? Yes, 3 weeks is a long time to be away. I try to get all the bills paid and everything caught up, but there is always lots to catch up on when I get back.  Entertaining a 3 year old and a 6 month old for most of some days...and sometimes overnight...takes lots of energy. I miss my place, my Master, my friends here, and miss out on some activities like book club and others. I love those little ones and have lots of fun, and they are always so excited to see me. I know I am blessed that I can do this, but like I said in my first sentence, 3 weeks is a long time.

   Maybe short spurts would be better than a long one. I think that is one of the things, Master wants me to do. He would like for me to discuss it with Him before I say yes ( which I am always supposed to do....I just sometimes want to  have things set, before I bring it up to Him...He calls this stubborness). He would like me to suggest weekly visits with a break at home...or something along those lines. I have gently suggested to my son that maybe finding a sitter or helper who does have to be flown in might be a good idea!  They do have crazy schedules, but I also realize they have to work that out...with some help from me.

   Who makes the son. He has dates picked out and flights checked out...but not booked...when he asks me. He does ask, I just am not very good at saying no...or even at saying lets talk about other options. 

    I think the tax is it seems most of you do. Master will not come into play on my next trip, but I will be traveling over Christmas...cannot miss those faces over the holidays, so we will see what happens ....

hugs abby

Saturday, October 20, 2012

some of this...some of that

        I woke up feeling at loose ends today...and the feeling just kept growing.  My voices including the 'not-so-friendly' voices keep trying to give me advice. I decided the best way to spend my with my daughter!  We went from store to store., did find some great bargains, and as a bonus, my Christmas shopping is close to being done. I have always (mostly), had the shopping done by December, so I feel great about meeting that goal! I found just what I wanted for everyone and some things for the impossible to buy for ones! 

     I have been asking Master for a while, if I could weigh-in once a week, instead of twice. He always has been quick to say, no, this is successful we will stick with it!  Well, I guess I finally wore Him of this coming weigh in report a week...and I even got to choose the day of the report. I chose Friday to give Him my report, hopefully that gives me a few days if I go a little crazy on the weekend.

   I also remembered to ask Master a question suggested in my comments....What would He not have His submissive do?  I said that anything that would land me in jail did not count...He thought about it for a bit, and then decided that although certain areas held no interest for Him, in general the rule that He follows no harm, He would never want to harm me....hurting me is another thing altogether:) 

   Master also told me that I under reported the number of orgasms I had in my last post. How is one supposed to actually count, when they are just rolling on top of each other.( I know a nice problem to Really counting the number is the last thing on my mind, actually my mind is being blown away. 

    Master also brought up the topic of my paying a tax when I go away from now on. I am going again in a couple of weeks, for another 3 weeks...hopefully the last long one for a good long while. This next trip does not count, since I had cleared it with Him, before He thought of the tax idea. He decided that I get one no tax week. Week number two will cost me 50, with the wooden paddle of His choice, for each day that week. Week number three, the tax increases to 100 a day. 

     I tried to say what if....He would not let me finish. It stands no matter what the reason for my being away, He knows that I always have a good reason...usually family related..and that I always miss Him loads. He said He wants me to think before I agree to extended time, how He feels and if He is going to be without me, I will have to pay the tax.  It's nice to know I am missed, but the tax seems a little high to me...

   I plan on getting some wrapping done tomorrow....the shopping is so much more fun than the wrapping. I like to actually wrap the grandkids' is so much more fun tearing the paper off as compared to reaching into a bag!

   Hope you are enjoying a nice fall weekend.

Wednesday, October 17, 2012

Submission questions...continued

  I know I am way behind the pack on these questions, but I do want to finish them....

21.  Is there a physical position that makes you feel most submissive?

      For me the one that is the most predominate is kneeling, naked, hands behind me, waiting.
It is a quiet anticipation time, focusing on opening up to Master. Of course, being over His lap, sitting naked in His lap (one of my favorites), being tied in any position, all of these put my head into that special submissive place.

22. Can you feel submissive without a dominate partner? If so, how does your submission express itself?

     Way back, when Master and I were first starting the M/s journey, there were times when I would feel that Master was losing interest, or was just too busy, and I would end up in a not so very good place...thinking and eventually letting Him....I can't be submissive to myself. So, my answer would be no, I do not feel submissive without a dominate partner. Even now, if I were to find myself without a dominate, I don't think I would be able to summons those submissive feelings.

23. Is there anything about submission (yours or what you see in others) that you question, dislike or repels you? Was there a time you questioned or were resistant to your own submissive feelings?

    As i have become older...and hopefully a little wiser...I find I have a much more of a 'whatever floats your boat' attitude.  As long as the two people involved agree, who am I to question their tastes?  Yes, there are some things that I might think,,,Yuck, but that is me, not them. 

   Before I met Master, I knew someone who referred to me as submissive. I laughed and said it showed how he did not really know me. His have not met the right person yet!  Guess he was wiser than I gave him credit for...

24.  What are the emotions that most directly let you access submission?  What feelings do they inspire?

     I guess I do not understand this question. Access submission? is a part of who I am, always with me, one of the many facets that make me, 'me'.  Feelings...what feelings does my submission inspire....I guess the whole gamut of feelings, depending on the situation and my frame of mind. 

have a good all


Tuesday, October 16, 2012

what would you not do??

   When Master and I were chatting and snuggling yesterday, He says, I have a question for your blog. He rarely makes any suggestions for my blog, so I was all ears. "What would you (submissives in general) not do for your Masters?

    My initial reply was, that covers a lot of ground...from taking His shoes off when He needs to relax, to helping Him commit a crime. Really, not quite what He was thinking of...I have no desire for a criminal record.

    Limits is what He was interested in...that one little word covers a lot of territory. Here's my 2 cents..or more...

    I believe everyone has limits, I have come to believe that they are fluid in nature. For me, limits are closely tied to trust, just as I feel that trust happens in layers over time, so does the ability to test limits...the more you trust, the more you are willing to push yourself, to go beyond what you once thought you could.

    There are lots of ways for limits to come into play. One of them is a safe word. I am a big proponent of safe words...I  have had one since the first time Master spanked me...over clothing and with His hand. In over 10 years I have never used it...yes I did come close a few times, during some pretty harsh punishments  years ago, but Master always seemed to sense when I had truly reached my limit. I am positive that if I ever said the word, He would honor it. There have been times when I cramped up or felt some tinglings of fingers or hands, and to be honest, I simply said...I have a cramp. We stopped, massaged and when I was ready went on.

    For some, limits are expressed in a contract or a check list of what I like, I might try, and hard limits. To be honest if Master had presented me with either of those when we were first starting, I would have panicked. I think a contract could be a good thing, as a starting point for discussions, but I also think, for me, it would have to be renegotiated regularly. The list, it would have had mostly hard limits checked off, I was simply looking to be spanked, so I could get it out of my system, out of my fantasies. (Yes , I did believe once would do it!)

    Many of the things that at one time I considered hard limits, we have done, and some I have wanted to keep trying;).  Yes, I still have some hard limits, but I do feel that they are in line with Master's. When I feel apprehensive or uncertain, I always have to option of saying...let's talk about this. When Master suggested a piercing, a few years ago, He had me research and look at articles and pictures and we talked about it a lot. It never  happened, but not because it continued to be a hard limit for me.

      Having written all the above , I also have to add....About 2 years ago, we were discussing something new...and I can't recall exactly what it was....but I was hesitant. As I though about it, I realized that if it was something Master really wanted to try;, I would try it, pleasing Him had moved way up on my list of priorities. I trust Him totally, He is not going to harm me, although it might took me by surprise to think that I had reached a point where I could be so open to Him, to His wants, needs.....and scared me a bit. But it is a good feeling, to know I can trust so completely without fear, I can be open with myself and know that there is someone who knows me, accepts me, and takes care of me. Thank You Master!


Monday, October 15, 2012

Back from one fantasy another!

     Hi all...made it back, last night. Exhausted...why has flying become such a chore...but it was a great vacation. We had been planning for 9 months, and it was worth the efforts. Almost every night we returned to the house, saying to each other...what a great vacation day! The little ones were all good, the girls were soooo very excited to see the princesses! We returned with tons of pictures and great memories....that is what it is all about...right after the 'hokey pokey'!

   Master and I stayed in touch every day, several times. Some days He gave me a special task for the day it was send me a pic of Mickey...another send me a naked pic of you...He likes to keep me guessing. Three weeks is a long time....too long...we both agreed. Today Master told me He is going to add a "tax" to my time away. A penalty I have to pay for each day away from Him...He suggested 100 with the wooden paddle. I started to say....You have to...He said what??? I repeated could not understand why He had not heard me...You have to....He said You are telling me what I have to do....3 weeks is really too long! OOPS!!! I did re-phrase..LOL!  This time i suggested that the penalty only start after a week or two.

     Today was our regularly scheduled M/M day....3 weeks is a long time between spankings. After lots of  hugging and chatting, I was kneeling for my Master naked and open to Him. Too quickly He asked me to get the wooden hair brush and get over His lap. What is it about having to fetch and hand the spanking toy over to Him that seems to increase the anticipation! 

     We had discussed my 'virgin' bottom, so He started with a nice hand warm-up and lots of rubbing. I was squirming almost from the beginning and had to keep reminding myself to take deep breaths and calm a bit. Then the brush came into 'play', lightly at first, til the tuck-in, which always signals, the real spanking is about to start. It hurt from the beginning, even though it certainly was not the hardest maintenance spanking ever. Then I hear...last 10...good news/bad news...only 10 more, but they will be much harder. Finally maintenance is over.

   Master is using His fingers to see if I was complaining too much. I am so ready to explode, it has been 3 weeks. I did get a few permissions while away, but Master's touch is always so much hotter and more effective than mine!  I was soon...very soon...moaning and making all kinds of noises, when Master tells me to sit up, and suck His cock. Master soon tells me to lie on my tummy and keep my lets spread open to  Him. Luckily Master is quick with His permissions, since I am on top of the other. When i finally, stop to breathe, I hear Master are making up for 3 weeks worth of orgasms. I feel like I can't move, but Master has other ideas, and we are off again, it feels so good, I want it to last, but Master's voice is soon telling me to cum for Him, I do....several more times. Finally I really cannot even move, breathing is a conscious effort, so we just relax and recover. 

   Master asked a question that He wanted me to post here.....we discussed it a bit, and I will let you all in on that tomorrow. I am still trying to catch up with all of you....but it is soooo good to be back!

   hugs abby