Friday, April 29, 2011

aaachooo!

Yes i am sitting here sniffling and keeping the kleenex close...hopefully I can banish this cold soon!

This was a week of ups and downs for me. Monday I returned home to Master and a delightful welcome. Then for some reason I started to feel at loose ends, loosing my calmness and talking to myself. Master had a busy week at work, so we were mostly texting and emailing and leaving voice messages, I kept telling myself to snap out of it...Monday had been so special.

Of course that did not work too well, by Thursday my morning text included that I had had an off week. I had plans for the day with friends, Master called at noon asking what time I would return. He was at work later than usual, but we did manage to meet for a short time. It was mostly cuddling and hugging and chit chat, with his fingers doing a little tugging and pinching and raoming. It was what I needed, I went to bed calmer and slept well.

Today was maintenance day. It rarely is on a Friday, but this was one of those weeks. Master did say, waiting til Friday kind of defeats the purpose and He wants it earlier in the week. I did not exactly set it up, but I had mentioned it in my voice message last Wednesday. He greeted me at the door with a wonderful hug...it did help that I loss 1 pound this week!

Then it was kneeling time, covering my ears with his hands and pushing my face into Him so I could not see, nor hear....just feel His touch reclaiming me, reminding me that He owns all of me. Then it was over His lap for a long, hard hand spanking. Master has a hard hand, but I love the feel, the intimacy of it on my bottom.

He spanked hard and long, I was trying not to squirm, but to keep breathing. It seemed to me He was concentrating on one spot...that spot just below my bottom that seems really tender. When I mentioned He could have spread the spanks around, Master replied that my bottom had gotten smaller and His hand covered all of it...what could I say to that?!

By the time He was done, I could feel myself practically dripping. Master commented on how wet, hot, and swollen I was. His hand is so much better than that acrylic paddle! It did not take long for me to be begging for permission, and for them to just keep on coming..or cumming. Before met Master I wondered what all the hype about orgasms was about...and if I managed 1, I was perfectly happy. Don't try to tell me you can't get better as you get older! Finally I layed over His lap, gasping for breath, sated and content. A perfect end to the week!

abby

Monday, April 25, 2011

It's good to be back home!

Hello all! I left Boston today, after a rainy, cold week. My little "sweet pea", caught a terrible cold, congestion, runny nose, even a temp. She was a trouper, at 19 months when I would rock her, and comfort her, she would look at me and say...thank you much grandma!

On the days that I travel, I usually text Master when I am ready to leave, and call him when I take a potty break. When I called Him at my stop this afternoon, He told me to come straight to Him, not home to unpack, no stop to get groceries, just right to Him. It made the last part of my drive much more interesting...and a little distracting!

Master greeted me with a big hug! He is just about finished with His bathroom project and about to start a redo of the kitchen! After He filled me on on some of that, it was kneeling time. Lately, He has me close my eyes and he covers my ears, so i am totally focused on Him, on my submission. It is a very calming time.

Then......Master mentioned last Wednesday evening. I...umm...was in a "mood" and let my attitude show. I saw it coming, and instead of pulling it back, just kept on going....like digging yourself a hole, and not being smart enough to stop and try to fill the hole, but you just keep digging.
Disrespect and attitude are never allowed. I apologized right away last week, but knew, although the apology was accepted, I still had a price to pay. I was told to get over the back of the sofa, and felt the coolness of the darn acrylic "paddle". IT HURT....and it was supposed to. I did not get up out of position, but i did raise up a little. After the first few, Master was reminding me that disrespect is expected every day, no matter where I am. I was told to repeat that phrase after each spank...loudly. I did, and after another set Master asked if I had been respectful every day that i was away...a not so loud, "no Sir", was my answer. After a few more Master asked if he needed to continue, a louder "no Sir" was my reply this time.

I was then allowed to go over His lap, for a wonderful welcome back hand spanking. After the spanking, His Hand felt even better than it usually does. Master soon asked if I would like to cum for Him...of course I thought that was a great idea. After usng up several permissions, I was spent, and so gld to be home again!

I did not get a chance to do any blog reading while I was away, but I am going to try and get caught up with all of you in the next couple days!

abby

Friday, April 15, 2011

on the road....again

I needed this week here at home...some time with Master. It has been calming, replenishing and reassuring.

This afternoon, i got to see the almost finished bathroom, it is quite a room! After we chatted a bit and a little kneeling time, it was over His knee....for a wonderfully long hand...well never quite long enough...spanking. He started over my jeans, then panties, then bottom. He spanked for quite a while, at a slow pace, increasing in intensity, while we chatted. I am leaving tomorrow to return to Boston, for about 10 days. Master reminded me of what He calls my "tool box". It contains all the tools i should use while i am away, to keep me focused. I will admit that i often let some of my routines slip and start to lose focus. Some of the tools, are my daily reports, asking for permissions, texting, calling, a good morning and good night message, a daily task...I am feeling more confident that i will be able to maintain that focus, i do realize that part of being able to, is thinking i can!

On Wednesday, Master had suggested that staying the same was not an option for this coming week, He wanted me to lose. I whined about it, but i agreed today, thinking that i should be staying on track with my eating and maybe some walking is the way to go. I find maintaining more difficult than losing, i tend to go overboard with the treats.

Then master decided that i would get His birthday spanking now, since i will be away on THE day...i am very disappointed about that. His hand birthday spanking was hard and very slow, with me counting out loud. I tried to make Him believe He was younger than He is, but it did not work.
At one point He was doing the current set of 20 all on the same spot, just below my bottom. I was thinkig to myself, You could move them around a little, when Master said, I can hear you thinking that I should move them around a little. I hate it when He can read my mind.....and is right!

When we finally ended with the correct number, Master's talented fingers started to roam....it did not take me long to be asking for permission to cum. Master decides to chat...i also hate that timing...lol.
He said i should cum for Him daily while i am gone. Now i imagine some of you are thinking....lucky girl....but i am not usually a daily type of girl, espicially when i am on my own. I mumbled something about every other day, Master replied, well, you agree to every day, or my fingers stop doing their magic until you get back. I was too far gone to agree to that...as He well knew...so i agreed. The reward was soooo worth it!

We hugged and hugged and said good by. Tonight i filled plastic easter eggs for my granddaughters first easter egg hunt!

Hope you all have a good week....abby

Wednesday, April 13, 2011

Maintenance.....birthday

...Today was maintenance day for this week. I had asked Master yesterday for a day, and my choice was today. Usually when i know when, i am calmer, more focused. Today, for some reason i was antsy all day, not for any one particular reason, just more on edge. When i saw Master, His day had not gone well. I suggested we could wait for another day either tomorrow or Friday. But he said no, today is fine. Master views maintenance as a reminder and a deterrant. Today's fell under the deterrant category. He told me to bend over the back of the sofa, one of my least favorite positions and i immediately felt something hard and cold on my bare bottom. With no warm up, He started with stong strokes and it did not take long until i was struggling to stay in place. He put His hand on my back and continued. After a few more i was ouching loudly...this was more that i had expected.
He stopped to rub my bottom and massage my back, asking me why we have maintenance, telling me that to be a deterrant to punishment it had to hurt, i had to remember it. Finally He asked if i was feeling better, i replied for now...He chuckled. Twelve more on each cheek...which meant on the exact same spot. I struggled through the first 12, but did manage to breathe and stay in place. Master always seems to spank harder on one side, and i was hoping the harder said was over with....and it was. The next side was easier to get through, partly because i knew they were the last 12....with the very last one being one to really remember.

We then talked about my being away again next week. Master knows my time with my grand daughters is important to me, and He graciously allows me all the time i need to be away. He said this time, i would have to return having loss weight, not staying the same. I "argued" pointing out why i thought that was impossible. Master was not buying it, since i am already above my goal, i need to get back there. I pleaded some more, and although He did not change His mind, He agreed we could talk about it some more on Friday, after my weigh in.

Birthday...not mine....not Master's....but of maintenance! One year ago tomorrow, I had my first maintenance spanking. There are times in every relationship that are crossroads or turning points, and i consider the start of maintenance to be an important day in my submission to Master.
One year ago today, i was feeling....not all that submissive. For a lot of reasons, i was feeling that Master and i had stopped moving forward, that i was struggling with submission and confused as to why i was struggling, why could i not just be or maintain my submission on my own? No, i did not feel i could discuss this with Master, but on that day i read a blog, that mirrored my feelings, and said it so well. I asked if i could quote the blog in a note to Master. It took me a while to hit the send button, but i sent the note, explaining that this was how i felt.

We met the next day, and Master's first words were....you need maintenance spankings. I immediately denied it, but He said, not it is a great idea. I had often wondered what it would be like to know that you would get spanked every week, not just every second, third or fourth week. I had my first maintenance spanking that week, and Master said they would happen weekly. To be honest i wondered how long the weekly part would last...even though i knew Master was a man of His word and always follows through. So every week for this past year, unless one of us was out of town for the whole week, or my back was out, i have been spanked, at least once. I quickly learned that if i had earned a punishment....it did not replace the maintenance spanking, it was in addition to it, a bit of a surprise.

Maintenance has been good for me, very good.
...Maintenance has helped to quiet the voices that would get into my head, and cause me to doubt, to waver, to get into trouble. Now those voices don't have much of a chance, Master is spanking them away!

...Maintenance has greatly diminished the need for Punishment spankings...the capitol P ones! Master means for them to be a deterrant, and He spanks so they are...i do not need to test or wonder. I can concentrate on pleasing, and that is so much nicer..for both of us , i hope.

...Maintenance has helped me to "relax" into my submission. Not sure i can explain this one, but i feel it has become a real part of me, of the every day me. To worry less about the mechanics , the whens, the ifs, the maybes, just leave those where they belong, in Master's hands.

...Maintenance has also given Master and i more time to talk face to face. Phone conversations, emails and texting are just not the same. We get to share more of our lives, we get to laugh more together, we seem more real life. We were real time Master and submissive, but it somehow did not feel like really part of my every day life, now i know, that i am His, every day, that i am submissive not just when i am getting spanked or whipped or flogged, but i am His submissive all of the time, no matter where i am, or what i am doing.

...All of the above has helped for this past year to be one of many steps forward. After 8 years, i finally cried for Master this year, more than once even! He is not only in my heart, but also in my head, He is my constant companion, mentor, Master.

Finally....THANK YOU Master. You know me better than i know myself. You are willing to give me what i need, You have more than earned my trust, my submission, my love. May this coming year be as good as this past one has been!

a very content abby

Monday, April 11, 2011

finally....

I am back from a delightful week with an extremely bright 19 month old...not that i am prejudiced! She is talking up a storm, and being a grandma is soooo much more fun than being a mom!

I did struggle, a bit, with staying on track for Master. In my defense, I did not see Him for 10 days before i left, and then i was gone a week. So it was a long dry stretch. Before i leave i always think i will not miss him as much this time and it will be easier, i think i should just face up to the fact...that will probably never happen. He says missing Him is a good thing, and missing Him more just shows that our connection is strong.

I weighed in and reported today, for the first time in over 2 weeks. I was laid up with my back before i left for Boston, so most of that week, i was just trying not to move too much. So no wii or walking for over 2 weeks, and having a daughter in law who loves to cook...well, it was no surprise,,,i gained 2 1/2. I did not think that that was awful, and i told Master that was sorry and that i knew that i had to get back to my goal weight.

This afternoon, i finally got to see Master. After my welcome back hugs, Master's hugs not just a quick squeeze and let's move on, needless to say, they feel soooo good! Then Master said, naked and kneeling please. I slowly got naked, and got into position. Master pressed my eyes shut with His hands, and told me to focus. Just Him and me, nothing else, just us.
He then massaged me into total relaxation..so He could "attack" my nipples, first one then the other. Then it was up and over His knee.

He started with a long hand spanking, starting off slowly and lightly, gaining speed and strength as He continued. His Hand is hard...but oh so wonderful! He then had this paint stick, to stir the paint , it was fairly long, but very thin. I really liked the quick stings, and as Master noticed He chuckled, and said easy....this is a spanking. He went to my thighs and down my legs a bit...just because He can spank me anyplace he pleases, He said. I mentioned He should not get rid of that stick.

Then came time for a serious paddling. I am actually not sure what he used, some type of wood, from his bathroom project...which is looking awesome. He asked if i knew why He had to paddle me...i answered Yes Sir, and would i accept it...again Yes Sir. But, i then asked, what if i had answered no...i was not ready, would He not paddle me. His reply...I would paddle you harder until you were ready, and then give you the original paddling on top of that, so are you ready....i replied quickly, Yes Sir.
There was no lite or slow start this time, and i did manage to stay in place and breathe through it. I was worried since it had been a while, but the warm up helped, and i did want to be good for Him. He then reminded me, that letting me get away with a gain would only lead me to doubts, and wondering if i could get away with more. He is probably correct about that.

Then came my real welcome, with His fingers reaching between my legs, and finding me very ready, bringing me right to the edge. When he pulled out i groaned, he chuckled. Then i felt that paint stick, and Master saying, lt's see if you can cum while i am spanking you. I honestly did not think so, but He had me well primed and ready, and that paint stick, does give a delicous sting, as Master increased the speed i was in the rhythm with Him, and soon i was going over that edge. Master was very pleased, and He proceeded to bring on a few more orgasms, i am not sure the number...but let's say my "dry spell" was wiped out! One thing that surpises me is how loud i sometimes get, that is just not me. When i told master i was sorry for being so loud, he said He loved the wanton me, it was a wonderful compliment to Him....as long as the neighbors don't start complaining.

So i am back, where i belong. I am ready to get back to that goal weight, and to be the submissive that Master deserves....now if only spring would put in an appearance.

linda

Saturday, April 2, 2011

no good ouches this week...

The good news is my back is finally feeling better, I no longer wake up every time I try to roll over in bed, and it feels much looser, and I can even bend....carefully! A couple commentors suggested a chiropractor, think I am going to look one up, thanks!

The not so good news, is no good..or any...spanks this week. It has been a long time since I have been home for a week, and have not been spanked. It has become part of my routine, and yes...i miss it!

I am off to Boston tomorrow. Going to help my son and daughter in law with some babysitting for my 18 month old grand-daughter, and my sister and I are going to take my mom on an overnight casino trip. I am looking forward to both of those, even though it means another week with no spanks.
I know I am blessed that my children want me around, and that I have the time and ability to help them out. Grandchildren are truly a wonderful blessing! I will be away for about a week, and hopefully by the time I return spring will have arrived!

abby